An Angel and a "God Box"

This blog post is dedicated to an Angel by the name of Linda Lewis, who left the Earth January 23^rd, 2018.

   

When I was 19 I moved out to Colorado. It was easy to find work especially around the ski areas. A friend from Defiance came to join me, and eventually we ended up living in a motel in Florissant, Colorado for a month in between jobs. Now there was the tavern called the Thunderbird Inn at this motel, owned by the same people. They were good, down to earth people, so when I moved back in 2011 I wanted to go look them up, and lo and behold, they still owned the bar. It felt like a little piece of home and a happy time in my life.

   Now we’re in 2013, and I’m realizing that I’m in an abusive and dysfunctional marriage and need to move back to Vermont. I hop on my steel pony and start the loop to Cripple Creek to clear the mind, but decide just to stop in at the Thunderbird for a taste of home and comfort. It was about two in the afternoon, Linda was bartending, there is only one other man in the bar and we all watched a movie together. I had never met Linda before that day. Although I tried to keep my misery and emotions to myself, she could tell I was suffering. Before I left she handed me her phone number and with complete sincerity she told me to call her if I ever needed anything. Now she could’ve pretended not to have seen my pain, or she could’ve kept to herself and not reached out to me, but that’s not who she was. When she saw suffering, she reached out toward it, and offered it comfort, and she didn’t just do this for me but for everyone in the community.

   Over the next few weeks we got together and rode bikes, she came and took me out to lunch, and in a very short time we became very close. During one of these visits she took me to her house and she said “you need a God box”. She pulled out a whole flat of them which was a little funny. Someone had gifted her these Chinese made resin boxes with the words faith, love, and hope, written on them. She insisted that I needed one and that if I wrote down all of my dreams and intentions for the shift I was about to make, put it in the box, they would come true. It wasn’t an easy time and because of this newfound friendship I was tempted to stay in Colorado. I put job applications out and on the day Grady and I were heading back to Vermont I got a call that I actually got one of those jobs, in the meantime I organized our move back without any place to stay long term when we arrived, so I put that on the list in my head. In Indiana I found a rental in East Hardwick on craigslist so we were set long term, but the rent was 1200$ a month. Also, when we returned Grady would be starting college at Paul Smith University and I had promised him I would pay for this first year, so I knew that bill would be facing me.

   To shorten up the story, eventually our things made it back to us in East Hardwick and the God box was found and Linda’s voice was moving through my head saying that I had to make my list as soon as I got back. That night I sat down and wrote down small things like getting Wi-Fi established and car insurance to paying for rent and Grady’s college tuition, also on the list at the very end was to buy a house. I put the box where I could see it and every month or so, I would get it out, and check off three or four things from the list. My work at that time was to try to free myself from anxiety. I wasn’t sleeping or eating, I was just working pretty much seven days a week from five in the morning to nine or ten at night, landscaping and seeing clients and eventually working at Hall’s market. After a year and a half, I had crossed everything off that list including the house. I have no idea how I achieved this, yes, I worked my butt off, but money and resources came from the air and this is all thanks to you Linda Lewis. 

Whenever you think you can’t, remember Linda and what I achieved. I’m nobody special, but clear intention works and we are powerful beyond measure. Linda will forever live in my heart.

A Solstice Message from Blue Jay

Last week, on one of Cedar's walks something was casting shadows from above, so we stopped to have a look. Blue Jays were flying into the tall treetops deep in the woods from every direction. There were at least 30-40 of them right above us , and they just kept flying in. They typically gather in a small group, but never have I seen so many together. I whispered a prayer of gratitude and we continued the walk .

A few days later, my partner Jerry, Cedar and I were on the same trail. When we approached the same area, lo and behold the Blue Jays were in the same treetops. There were half as many this time , maybe around 25. He was astounded, as was I, and we both knew we were witnessing something very special.

The next day I went up with Cedar and of course I had to stop in that same area and look up. Disappointed that there weren’t any Blue Jays in the treetops I just stood and thought about what they might mean. As I was quiet I could hear them calling in the distance, after some time I realized that they were calling from all four directions.

In the meantime they were visiting the bird feeders in droves. Enough that I had to fill them every other day and still do. One day I counted 10 out at the back feeder at once .

The room I do yoga in is facing the back bird feeders. The mantra one day was worthiness. I was following this yoga class on YouTube and was moving through it with ease. Towards the end of the class a well of emotion released from my chest and eyes. It’s hard to describe, but I saw my ancestors behind and my children in front and the lineage of the shadow of unworthiness throughout us all.  Then , inside of us ,  there was a small, stout woman moving through, sweeping up the dust of unworthiness. Deep deep emotion was moving through, but I was aware enough to see a shadow move across my closed eyes. I got up to see what this was and it was a Blue Jay.

I am feeding the Blue Jays with deep gratitude. They are appearing as a transitional power animal. Here to teach, and then move on when the lesson is learned or integrated. Blue Jays teach about the proper use of power.